The one on my forehead? That’s from banging my head into the window at John Fluevog’s store on Granville Street after spotting the new shoe about which I will obsess until it is no longer a) the perfect shoe or b) $235.
Here is where you can see the shoe, since Fluevog’s site uses frames. God, how I hate frames. But I love shoes! So I find solutions.
While I waited for a light to change, swatting at the free papers with my bayonet, I observed the following:
A 24-Hours Paper Guy thrust his wares at an approaching businessman. The businessman reached into his shirt pocket and countered with a copy of The Watchtower. Moments passed. The 24-Hours Paper Guy shook his head. The businessman walked on with a smile.
Tomato Nation. It may not be very nice but it is very, very funny.
1. My new doctor peforming my “annual” exam & pap smear. She was in and out so fast, I checked under her coat to see if she was actually a 14-year-old boy dressed up like a doctor.
2. Listening to the construction workers right outside the exam room talking about what they’re going to do this weekend. A lot of beer, apparently.
And some “giv’er.”
3. When Botox’d people try to smile. “Excuse me: you have POISON in your FACE.” LOVE that.
4. Pat Benatar and Queen Latifah in the remix of “Love is a Battlefield.” Uh huh. Yeah. Benatar.
5. This morning’s “Early Edition” LIVE from The ‘Nam restaurant in Kitsilano on the occasion of Kitsilano’s 100th birthday with special guest host George Puil! of questionable transit-tactics fame. At first I thought maybe they were trying to get him killed. Why else would you put a Translink board member amidst people who actually take the bus? I kept listening for the sound of his skull being smashed in or his limbs being pulled from his body but people seemed to laugh (albeit nervously) at his jokes and tolerate (somewhat edgily) his input. Perhaps what they say about gentrification is true. Or maybe everybody was stoned. Damn hippies.
Yesterday I tasted the “Bacon n’ Egger” at A&W. Though I usually decry anything that has “N” in its title, the deliciousness was so overwhelming that I have been downstairs to eat more of them almost every hour on the hour ever since.
Well they’re 2 for $3! Bacon n’ Egger! N’ they have bacon or sausage n’ they have processed cheese that goes all melty into the n’ egg part. N’ Mmmm.
My apologies to those who ride the elevator after me. I am probably acquiring a reputation as a chronic flatulator. But it’s the n’egg that smells, I swear!
In other news:
Goddessa Smites you who put the water container on the cooler without removing the little paper tab so that the little paper tab is now floating around in the big jug of water. It has a taggy bit that peels off! Peel it off!
While she is on the topic and though this may seem contradictory, Goddessa also smites those of you who finish off a container of water on the cooler and then walk away without replacing the container or even mentioning to Goddessa that it is empty. Goddessa swears that last week she replaced that damn thing every day and it’s not that Goddessa minds the heavy lifting (she is, after all, unstoppable) but she does mind the expectation that someone else will do it, as well as the associative lackadasiality. Sometimes Goddessa just wants some tea.
You done been smote.
