Tag Archives: relationship

Nine

(I don’t remember when I first knew I loved the number nine but I think it was in elementary school. Even now, seeing the word “nine” makes me happy.)

The weather is splendid and SA and I sat out on our porch this evening and talked like people do. We live in a townhouse, with a ‘privacy hedge’ that might sometimes feel too thin but tonight it was just right. The clouds looked like 6-packs of abs, do you know those clouds? Rippled? And it was cool outside, cooler than inside, but now it’s nicer inside than out.

There is a lot to be said for partnering with someone who has the opposite modus operandi than you. I explained to SA tonight how I realized recently that one of the keys to our successful (12 years!) relationship is: he is a problem-solver and I am a problem-preventer. At first he didn’t believe me and then I explained it some more, with different metaphors and examples, and then he believed me. Then he said “it must be hard for you.” “No harder than it is for you,” I said.

Seeing someone else’s world view is always hard. Being in a long-term relationship means accepting someone as he is, accepting that you are different from him, and accepting that the two of you together make an engine. One part gasoline, one part spark.*

*no science involved in this post.