The Cheeseblog

I love my referrer page. It’s where I can see how people (and, increasingly Sp@m0rs) have found this site. Though I know he or she does not stick around to ponder the questions I present and admire the photos I post, it gives me some small joy to know that someone found this site through a yahoo search for “italian girls” + “mayonnaise” . I like to think that someone is taking an Italian girl on a date and is wondering what to serve her for a snack. It’s a considerate thing to search the internet to prepare for taking the possible love of your life out on a Friday night. And it’s a fair question. I’m part Italian and I really don’t like mayonnaise all that much.

Favourites from the past include:

“Large sunflower seed David”
“Fallopian blogg art”
“What will my baby look like?”
and
“But we’ve got nothing to eat!”

What if you pretended you were three people, to make your own life seem less ordinary? This girl talks about her friend, Rachael, and it sounds to me like Rachael is an imaginary friend. But there is Rachael’s blog, linked right above the other BF, Beth and the two BFs seem real but what if all three are just a construct of one?

What fun but how exhausting it would be to maintain three lives. I think I won’t do that.

And then here, here we have some spammer’s blog? When I read “here we have the best baby-making toy” I was like, OK well moving along then but when I scrolled down it just got weirder and weirder. Did not click any of the links. Do not recommend that you do either but scroll to the bottom for fun and laughter. I particularly enjoyed this entry:

“Sometimes when you’re getting advice from all over the place on Original Star Toy War it’s hard to wade through the sagacious renderings from the bad advice. There’s so much good, sound, relevant material on Original Star Toy War that it’s often very hard to know where to start. When we began this site we knew that we were going to be relaxed in providing you the recommended websites for Original Star Toy War, we believe we have achieved that.”

When I receive sagacious renderings from the bad advice, I often feel defeated before I have even begun. But now? Ah, now.

Don’t ask why I did a google search for “urine + soft.”

No, just don’t.

But apparently, “Sniffing urine…can be useful towards sinusitis and other nose problems. It has been shown as a very good preventative for colds and to clean the subtle channels in the head.”

Subtle channels indeed.

OK so first I wanted to point out how they pimped Michael Moore but I couldn’t find any photos of his new trim-beard, dark suit & those goddamn emo glasses look. If you haven’t seen him lately, trust me: he’s a corset away from a look-share with Matthew Good. Please don’t let him start singing.

Then, perfectly, today’s National Post has a big ol’ baseball cap and pube-beard photo of Michael on the cover. And dude! He’s obviously got more look-shares invested in Peter Griffin!

Oh I’m sure I’m not the first to point this out. This may not even be the first time I have ever noticed – my memory is not what it used to be. But it makes me giggle.

Michael Moore
v
Peter Griffin.

Ole!

Oh, there’s no connection. Just the little strand of spittle in my overclocked brain.

So above we have Mom’s belated birthday cake of Choco-love…

And there we have Seamus and the as-yet-unnamed Christmas Duck.