Snared

Tyra Banks is twice the size of FergieFerg. She reached down to hug Fergie after Fergie performed “Fergalicious” (Will.I.Am sang too. He sang the part that went “T to the A to the S to the T EY”) and it looked kind of like Godzilla reaching for whatsher – Fay Wray?

Speaking of lyrics that must S to the P to the ELL everything, is there room for one more reality show? I am thinking pop star spelling bee. Alex Trebek and Diddy could be the judges.

I spent some time staring at Fergie on the Tyra Banks show today, trying to determine just what it is that makes my skin crawl, other than the music and I think it’s her lips. I don’t think anyone (or Fergie) should feel obliged to wear lipstick. Nay, nay. But if she’s going to go to the trouble of false eyelashes, lots-o-liner and domino-encrusted fake nails? (I wish I could find a picture for you. These put those of Showgirls to shame) The flesh-coloured lips make it look like maybe Fergalicious forgot something. Oh and the zombie eyes. They don’t help matters.

Tyra asked her what “London Bridge” means and Fergie said, “Oh, I’d like to leave that up to the imagination.” Tyra said, “Is it about sex?” (!) And Fergie said, “Oh it definitely is going in that direction…” I guess she forgot the part in the video where’s she’s licking those poor London guards.

Why do I spend so much time thinking about Fergie?

Nablopomo makes idiots of us all, I guess. I spent the day hitting that damn randomizer and reading other peoples’ posts. I came across a lot of Livejournal. I think Livejournal should have a category for each entry for “drinking.” You know, the way they have “listening” and “mood”?
For my Livejournal entry, “drinking” would read:

“The Fergie”
1 grape Freezie, broken in several pieces into wine goblet
1 splash lemon juice
1 jigger cold water
1 generous jugger spiced rum

D to the E to the L to the I to the

…ah fuck it.