Five Ways an Overtired 2 year old is The Bad Drunk From That One Party

1. Runs around the room crashing into furniture.
2. Stops periodically to crawl on your lap and cover your face with loud, exaggerated kisses.
3. Every few minutes, flops down on the floor and says, “I love you, Seamus!” to the cat.
4. When the cat does not return the affection, says, “You should go away. You are a bad cat.”
5. Rubs cream cheese into his hair and, when discouraged from this practice, roars like a wounded lion and then flops to the floor and stares at the ceiling for five minutes.

* Bonus: stops what he’s doing when How Soon is Now? by The Smiths comes on the radio. Shouts, “I love this song!” Continues running around the room crashing into furniture.

Good thing we have 17 years to train before he gets served in a bar.
(Without fake ID.)
(Assuming he can get to age 19 without sleeping.)
(Also assuming I can get to age 53 without sleeping.)