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There is a small card jammed in the middle of every wonderful issue of TV Week Magazine. It displays a crazy knick knack for sale. You know; sandal pendant inspired by the “Footprints” poem (? – as in, is it a poem? Is there a word for inspirational claptrap?) or china figurine in the shape of Diana, princess of Wales, or John Wayne Commemorative Knife.

I won’t go on; you can browse the site yourself if you’re feeling strong of constitution. Watch for the purses emblazoned with your favourite breed of dog.

I thought I had seen it all. Until SA asked me to brace myself, no, he wasn’t kidding, and handed me this week’s card. It featured a small ceramic mouse figurine sitting on a plush pink pillow, wearing a very large pink hat and a long string of pearls; like the mouse had been playing dress-up in its mother’s closet, if mice have closets and who is to say they do not? And above the picture of the mouse, written in pink cursive: Hats off To A Cure!

Oh yes, me hearties, it is a breast cancer awareness ceramic mouse. Pardon. Not ceramic. Crafted of artist’s resin. $29.99 plus shipping, with unspecified proceeds to breast cancer research etc. and I quote:

This limited-edition collectible figurine is the premiere issue of a first-ever Charming Tails collection created to bring awareness to this worthy cause. Handcrafted and hand-painted in artist’s resin, the figurine is accented with pink ribbons throughout, real feathers, simulated gems and pearls, and her fabulous hat is trimmed with synthetic fur. As this subject touches people worldwide high demand is anticipated for this limited edition benefiting breast cancer charity. An inspiring keepsake for yourself or a delightful breast cancer awareness gift! Order now.

Here, I will save you some trouble and some space on your already overcrowded mantle. There is a disease called cancer. Sometimes it is in your breasts or the breasts of someone you love. Like any cancer, it can kill. Now go donate some money to the charity of your choice.

One of my favourite posts about breast cancer “awareness” and pinkification is here at i blame the patriarchy. She says it all and so much better than I could.

While you’re there, I also love this post about a cervical cancer awareness campaign involving underwear sales.

And so, nethers and nips covered, I have completed my bodily awareness campaign for the day.

PS: SA’s dad sent me a link to this article in the Ottawa Citizen explaining that working for the government makes you crazy. Spot on, Ottawa Citizen. To follow: 20 years of “strategic and proactive investigation” followed by some “committee-inspired roundtables” and some “ground-up re-invigorative approaches to synergistic improvements.” Only then will we truly know how to make it so working for the government doesn’t make you crazy.