Surprise! Etc.

Hellow! Well, I sure didn’t expect to read this editorial in the Abbotsford Times. Colour me abashed. (I think that’s a baby-blue shade.)

Today 2 of my best friends, the most adorable baby in the world and the most lovely Pat The Mum in the whole universe began a drive east that will not end for days and and will not bring them back my way for a long-ass time. (Unless they forgot something important, but I doubt this as I watched most everything they didn’t pack or ship get thrown away) To console myself, today I have napped, eaten popcorn made with my newly-retrieved Popcorn Pumper, (how I have missed thee, PP!) read most of The Diviners (which I started at the beginning of June) and purchased Idahoan Potatoes (in a box) for dinner.

Well, there will also be some flank steak wrapped around spinach and mozzarella and some garlic bread. Because carbs are not the enemy; they are the FUTURE!

But boxed Idahoan Potatoes! With the margarine and the milk and the boiling water and that packaged sour cream and chives smell. Reminds me and SA of our broke years when instant potatoes were not a sidedish, but a main course. (he ate his with hamburger relish. I usually chose hot sauce.) Of course: with extra cheese is always better.

Witnessed yesterday: a man in a cowboy hat, backing his mini-van into oncoming,(one-way street) rush-hour, long-weekend traffic so that he could parallel park in a spot about a block away. Dude! Go around the block!

Speaking of fuckwits, what’s with the people riding their bicycles the wrong way down one-way streets? If you want to play “riding on the road with other modes of transportation,” and be all “respect! 2 wheels good!” you should have to follow the rules. If it was me with my flipflops and tweed blazer on my 10-speed bicycle with my hair blowing in the breeze because helmets are an attempt to repress my self-expression versus the Escalade-piloting, matcha-tea-sipping, Bluetooth-gabbing, Botoxy-hottie who just turned around whilst driving to check that her mini-shitzy-poo has enough champagne in his bowl, I would suck it up for a bit and ride the same direction as everyone else.

And that. Is all.

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