There are Over 20,000 Pores on Your Face! That’s 20,000 Chances to Glow!

I have watched The O.C three times now and each episode has begun with the dark-haired boy coming into the light-haired boy’s room and waking him to talk about relationship issues. Is it a homosexual subtext or is that the way the people wake up in California? That would be nice; a person to wake me with polite conversation about the prom instead of the chattering radio people who lie about the weather.

Tonight George Lucas was on The O.C. He has a head like a large, bearded melon. But! There is a Mr. VaderHead! I mean, a Darth Tater! I mean! Um!

Things I don’t like about the television tonight:

1. A cleaning product called Easy Off BAM! spray.

2. A sink as dirty as the one in the ad that needs the BAM! spray. Don’t you people ever wash your dishes?

3. Since when is toothpaste called a “dental plan”? Who wants vanilla mint toothpaste? Why is Emeril selling it? And again with the Bam?

4. A woman on CNN talking about how smutty the books are for young adults. Apparently they are smuttier than when she was a girl. Her daughter brought one home from the library. Said the woman, “These books…if someone wanted to find out how to have sex? They could find out in one of these books!” Revolutionary. I predict a spate of abstinence-only, promise-ring-wielding heroes and heroines to take the literature world by storm with their inspirational stories involving The Right Decision at the Right Time and plenty of chaste kissing.

5. Oh The Apprentice. How you wound me with the train wreck that is Tana.

I will read some words instead.

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