Ultrasound technician, digging madly at my midsection: Darn baby! Won’t turn around for me. Come…on…TURN! (pokes hard) Come on!
Me: It’s sleeping…
UT: Well, I got a really good profile shot. But I need a head on shot too. I need it to turn. (cajoling) Come on baby….come on baby…
Me: Funny – with my son’s ultrasound we couldn’t get good shots of him because he was moving around so much. This one’s just lying there. Chillin’.
UT: (grits teeth) FINE. I’m moving down to measure its legs. OH COME ON.
Me: Hmm?
UT: It’s legs are crossed. Look! Perfectly cross-legged. So comfortable.
Me: (laughing) Little yoga baby.
UT: Harumph.
- time passes -
UT: All right. (pokes hard) TURN.
Me: Hey – it’s turning –
UT: YES! There…there…there’s its eye and there’s
Me: Good lord!
UT: There, there’s the lens of the eye
Me: Ack!
SA: It’s an alien!
UT: There’s a great shot for you (clicks keyboard). OK – we’re done!
It’s a good thing I know how these things turn out because this is the most terrifying portrait I have ever seen and it doesn’t help to think that its subject is inhabiting my body.
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That was exactly my thought! Only there’s a circle underneath that you can’t see, which is its belly but it TOTALLY LOOKS like it’s driving a car. Some kinda flaming Mars Attacks alien gonna come screeching out in four months…
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Whoa.
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We had one of these. Born on a Monday. The rhymes don’t lie. That technician must be a kind of frustrated dentist, what do you think?
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Looks just like you.
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…dentist or failed competitive ski coach.
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Um … beautiful big, er, eye.
I know, they’re pretty scary, these ultrasounds. Riley looked just like Skeletor in his.
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My god. It’s teeth look pointed! It really does look like a cackling vampire cyclops pulling a one-handed hard right in mustang. That’s so awesome.
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