{"id":940,"date":"2007-11-23T10:46:26","date_gmt":"2007-11-23T18:46:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=940"},"modified":"2007-11-23T10:46:26","modified_gmt":"2007-11-23T18:46:26","slug":"its-coming-right-for-us","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=940","title":{"rendered":"IT&#8217;S COMING RIGHT FOR US!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I followed the link to <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cbc.ca\/technology\/story\/2007\/11\/23\/sf-oil-spill.html\"> this news story <\/a>because the headline was about sea ducks.  <b>San Fran oil spill hurts Canadian sea duck population,<\/b> it read.  But when I read the first paragraph, as follows: <i>An oil spill in San Francisco Bay two weeks ago killed and oiled thousands of birds, with a Canadian sea duck among the largest casualties,<\/i> I re-wrote the headline in my head to read:<\/p>\n<p>CANADA&#8217;S LARGEST SEA DUCK MURDERED IN SF BAY!  <\/p>\n<p>with a subheadline,<\/p>\n<p><i>Incident not related to <a href=\"http:\/\/www.publicsafety.gc.ca\/prg\/ns\/le\/cle-eng.aspx\"> terrorists<\/a> or <a href=\"http:\/\/www.organizedcrime.ca\/index_e.asp\"> organized crime.<\/a> And we should know, said officials from Canada&#8217;s Department of Public Safety.<\/i><\/p>\n<p>And then I waited for my call from <a href=\"http:\/\/www.theonion.com\"> The Onion.<\/a>  But it never came.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I followed the link to this news story because the headline was about sea ducks. San Fran oil spill hurts Canadian sea duck population, it read. But when I read the first paragraph, as follows: An oil spill in San &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=940\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23,41],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-940","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ducks","category-media"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/940","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=940"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/940\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=940"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=940"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=940"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}