{"id":905,"date":"2007-10-17T10:32:21","date_gmt":"2007-10-17T18:32:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=905"},"modified":"2007-10-17T10:32:21","modified_gmt":"2007-10-17T18:32:21","slug":"bless-his-heart","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=905","title":{"rendered":"Bless His Heart"},"content":{"rendered":"

Elevator.<\/p>\n

Co-worker: Hey
\nMe: Hey
\nCo-worker: I gotta say, you really got your figure back. I can’t even tell you had a baby!
\nMe: Thanks.
\nMe: So, can you tell I’m going to have another one?
\nCo-worker (glances at my belly, apparently for the first time in a long while) Really?
\nMe: Mm hmm.
\nCo-worker: Wow.<\/p>\n

And the elevator goes “ding!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Elevator. Co-worker: Hey Me: Hey Co-worker: I gotta say, you really got your figure back. I can’t even tell you had a baby! Me: Thanks. Me: So, can you tell I’m going to have another one? Co-worker (glances at my … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[21,28],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-905","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny","category-the-elevator"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/905","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=905"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/905\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=905"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=905"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=905"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}