{"id":484,"date":"2005-07-26T06:23:15","date_gmt":"2005-07-26T14:23:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=484"},"modified":"2005-07-26T06:29:01","modified_gmt":"2005-07-26T14:29:01","slug":"do-not-take-advice-from-the-man-with-no-hair","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=484","title":{"rendered":"Do Not Take Advice from The Man With No Hair"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Checking out the news yesterday, scrolling through to get past all the death and dismemberment, I came across a little piece (in the Science section, naturally) about the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cbc.ca\/story\/science\/national\/2005\/07\/22\/sandals050722.html\"> Dangers of Sandals.<\/a>  According to the author, in the summertime, women often wear sandals despite the fact that, &#8220;&#8230;open-toed summer footwear can leave feet blistered, calloused, bleeding and sometimes exuding pus.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>Um.  <\/p>\n<p>Your feet should not be exuding pus.  If your feet are exuding pus, step one is to stay home from work, not pose for a newspaper photographer.<\/p>\n<p>The solution offered by podiatrists?  Wear socks with your sandals.  And I quote: &#8220;Podiatrists say the best way to avoid blisters is to wear sandals with socks. This former fashion faux pas is said to be the next big look in footwear.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Um.  Never, ever, ever will socks with sandals be OK.  Got it?  Except you, young Japanese girls with knee socks and jelly shoes.  You&#8217;re fine.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m no podiatrist, but I do know shoes.  And I know that there are plenty of options available to the fashionable among us.  One of those options is attractive, comfortable shoes.  I can tell you where to get some if you like.<\/p>\n<p>Another option is NOT SANDALS WITH SOCKS.  <\/p>\n<p>Anyway, how likely is it if your feet are exuding pus (shiver) because you wear Jimmy Choos to work that you will turn around and say &#8211; aha!  Lightbulb moment! I will wear <b>socks<\/b> with my $400 sexy Jimmy Choo shoes!  That way no one will see my hideous feet!  And their pus!  <\/p>\n<p>I knew a woman who wore Jimmy Choo shoes.  Let&#8217;s just say she would have sprinkled hot sauce and cottage cheese on them and eaten them with a side of new potatoes before she would have put a pair of socks anywhere near them.<\/p>\n<p>And I really hate the word pus. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Checking out the news yesterday, scrolling through to get past all the death and dismemberment, I came across a little piece (in the Science section, naturally) about the Dangers of Sandals. According to the author, in the summertime, women often &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=484\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-484","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-shoes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=484"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=484"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=484"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=484"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}