{"id":1114,"date":"2008-09-24T19:42:45","date_gmt":"2008-09-25T03:42:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=1114"},"modified":"2008-09-24T19:42:45","modified_gmt":"2008-09-25T03:42:45","slug":"emergency-cookies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=1114","title":{"rendered":"Emergency Cookies!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I found myself at a new food-concerned blog today, called <a href=\"http:\/\/everybodylikessandwiches.blogspot.com\/\"> everybody likes sandwiches <\/a> and I was happily scrolling through lots of delicious recipes when I saw a link to an <a href=\"http:\/\/everybodylikessandwiches.blogspot.com\/2006\/11\/model-behaviour.html\"> oatmeal cookie recipe.<\/a>  So I followed.  It was a post from 2006 and the oatmeal cookie recipe was in honour of that night&#8217;s episode of America&#8217;s Next Top Model.  And there I was, reading it ON ANTM NIGHT.  What could I do?  Trombone thought he&#8217;d died &#038; gone to heaven.  &#8220;Oh, I LIKE cookies,&#8221; he affirmed as he stole chunks of butter while my back was turned. (the recipe calls for canola oil and claims it&#8217;s just as good as butter but I actually didn&#8217;t have any canola oil OH WELL)  Excellent recipe.  Delicious.<\/p>\n<p>So go, do it.  It&#8217;ll take you 20 minutes.  Make oatmeal cookies and eat them while you laugh at the supermodel wannabes who can&#8217;t eat oatmeal cookies because they are afraid to eat.  Especially eat them while you watch the supermodel wannabes pose for some wretched semi-submerged under water &#8220;smile with your eyes&#8221; photos.<\/p>\n<p>Hey, over here. COOKIES.<\/p>\n<p>The End.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I found myself at a new food-concerned blog today, called everybody likes sandwiches and I was happily scrolling through lots of delicious recipes when I saw a link to an oatmeal cookie recipe. So I followed. It was a post &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=1114\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[32,29,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1114","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bloggity","category-food","category-television"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1114","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1114"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1114\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1114"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1114"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1114"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}