{"id":1073,"date":"2008-07-12T10:44:55","date_gmt":"2008-07-12T18:44:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=1073"},"modified":"2008-07-12T10:51:40","modified_gmt":"2008-07-12T18:51:40","slug":"the-value-of-time-or-the-difference-two-years-makes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=1073","title":{"rendered":"The Value of Time, or, The Difference Two Years Makes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Is it like this the more children you have?  You just constantly wonder what the hell you were doing all the time when you had no kids \/ just one kid \/ just two kids \/ just 16 kids?  Luckily I don&#8217;t have to wonder, I have this &#8216;blog to remind me what crazy trivial things I had to think about before I had only 10 minutes a day to myself.  Which is not a &#8220;oh now that I&#8217;m a mother I only think about my precious children because they are the future and everything else is trivial&#8221; thing but more a &#8220;I don&#8217;t have the time or energy to think about anything that doesn&#8217;t directly involve the things that are right in front of me demanding all my time and energy&#8221; thing.<\/p>\n<p>Thank goodness in my former work life I was a fairly skilled administrative assistant.  This means that when I suddenly find myself in the glorious environment that is My House with Only Me and One Other Child In It because the first child has gone out with its father I waste no time prioritizing the things I want to do and then getting right down to doing them.  I make a game of it.  It&#8217;s like a more trivial form of &#8220;what would you do now if you knew you would die tomorrow.&#8221;  &#8220;What would you do now if you knew your sleeping infant could wake up at any moment.&#8221;  Sometimes I hum the Chariots of Fire theme song to help myself stay focused.<\/p>\n<p>1. shower.  first time in three days.  oh dear me.<br \/>\n2. check on sleeping infant, who is now awake but not unhappy, just listening to the opera on the CBC French FM.  make mental note to be flabbergasted by this later.<br \/>\n3. tell infant I will be right back to pick him up after I comb my hair<br \/>\n4. in the time it takes to comb hair (approx 10 minutes) decide to get a haircut.  TODAY.<br \/>\n5. check on awake infant, who has, miraculously, gone back to sleep.  make mental note to buy infant a beer someday when he&#8217;s old enough.<br \/>\n6. eat some pizza<br \/>\n7. finish coffee<br \/>\n8. start some laundry<br \/>\n9. check on sleeping infant, who is still sleeping<br \/>\n10. call mother and chat<br \/>\n11. eat more pizza while staring at sleeping infant, who starts waking up<br \/>\n12. feed infant.  he goes back to sleep.<br \/>\n13. decide not to risk waking him by changing his diaper.  prioritize myself over child&#8217;s wet bum.  do not stop to berate self for this.  will buy him two beers when he&#8217;s old enough to make up for this terribly lax parenting.<br \/>\n14. check email and &#8216;blog<br \/>\n15. remember laundry which drying should come next.  de-prioritize that until after finished &#8216;blog entry.<\/p>\n<p>Long-time readers of this &#8216;blog will remember that almost two years ago I got a monumental haircut.  It was during the November festival that is National Blog Posting Month so I was posting an entry to this blog every day and I milked the haircut for I think three or four daily entries.  Now it is July and I really don&#8217;t need to write any more about my hair. I just need it to be shorter because a) it is very hot b) it doesn&#8217;t look like I am going to get to shower every day for another two months c) it is coming out in big handfuls and I don&#8217;t have time to comb my hair for that long d) this is boring and you&#8217;ve heard it all before.  Look you&#8217;ve all gone to sleep in your little chairs!<\/p>\n<p>This afternoon, infant gods willing, I am going to walk to the closest place that will cut my hair.    Luckily I live in the Mizzle, where there are <a href=\"http:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=702\"> more places that cut hair<\/a> than there are places that sell groceries so I am sure to have success.  Where success = less hair.  Style mileage may vary.  <\/p>\n<p>No time to edit!  Must put laundry in dryer and then remove toenail polish from the pedicure I got 3 months ago!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Is it like this the more children you have? You just constantly wonder what the hell you were doing all the time when you had no kids \/ just one kid \/ just two kids \/ just 16 kids? Luckily &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/?p=1073\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[32,55,57,56],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1073","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bloggity","category-fresco","category-hair","category-two-children"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1073","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1073"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1073\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1073"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1073"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/torturedpotato.com\/cheeseblog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1073"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}